Three teams of astronauts, an American team, German team, and Serbian team, are sent on an exploratory mission to one of Jupiter's moons. After a safe landing the three teams suit up and step out onto the surface. They soon begin to quarrel over which nation gets to lay claim to this moon.

One of the Americans declares, "I hereby claim this moon as property of the U.S.A. If it were not for our heavy investment in space travel this trip would not have happened!

One of the Germans then declares, "Nein! This moon shall belong to Deutschland! It was our scientists and physicists who made this possible!"

One of the Serbians then draws a gun from his spacesuit and shoots his fellow Serbian who collapses dead onto the rocky surface.

He yells, "Serbian blood has been drawn here! This moon belongs to SERBIA!!!

During the Cold War, the US decides to send and agent to the USSR. Lets call him Juri.
Juri arrives and tries to blend in, enlists in the military. However, his superior has doubts:
-Juri, Juri, I thinks you’re an American spy!
-No way! Test me if you don’t believe me.
So Juri gets tested. He has to drink two litres of vodka in one sitting, wrestle with a grizzly bear and take a naked bath in the icy waters. He passes all tests with great success.
-Juri, Juri, I still have doubts over you!
-But why? I’ve done everything to prove I’m as good a Russian as you.
-Certainly… except that you’re black.

Another Samoobrona member, serving as a member of the European Parliament, recently faced allegations of raping a sex worker in Belgium.

At the time, Lepper was harshly criticised for his light-hearted reaction to the allegations. "How can you rape a prostitute?," he asked reporters as he chuckled.

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://rawstory.com/news/2006/Sexual_harassment_allegations_plagu_12042006.html

- With the help of Greece, may I invade Djibouti?

Lenin, Stalin, and Brezhnev are all travelling together in on a train. Unexpectedly the train stops. Lenin suggests: "Perhaps, we should call a subbotnik, so that workers and peasants fix the problem." Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, "If the train does not start moving, the driver will be shot!" But the train doesn't start moving. Brezhnev then says, "Comrades, Comrades, let's draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and pretend we're moving!"

The Serbian police found an old Gypsy sitting by the Belgrade train station repeatedly screaming: "I don't want to make Burek!, I don't want to make Burek!...." and so on. (Burek is a Balkan meat, cheese or vegetable pie made with flaky filo dough.

One policeman asks the Gypsy man: "What do you mean you don't want to make Burek?

The Gypsy man replies: "I see the way things are going on Kosovo!! I don't want to make Burek!!!"

The two policeman dumbfounded and dealing with a potential disturbance tell the Gypsy man once again: "Nobody is forcing you to make Burek and what the heck does the situation on Kosovo have to do with you and Burek?

The Gypsy man looks at the police:

"Read the paper!! Before (in history) the Serbs used to be politicians in the world, the Gypsy's used to steal and the Albanian's used to make Burek.
Today the Serbs are stealing, the Albanians are the politicians! I DON'T WANT TO MAKE BUREK!!!"

A dwarf runs Santa Claus office:

“Hi, Santa! I have Fidel Castro, Kim Jong Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on the phone right now. They all want to know what we exactly mean by term “bad children”?”

One of the Americans declares, "I hereby claim this moon as property of the U.S.A.katalog firm If it were not for our heavy investment in space travel this trip would not have happened!One of the Germans then declares, "Nein! This moon shall belong to Deutschland! It was our scientists and physicists who made this possible!"One of the Serbians then draws a gun from his spacesuit and shoots his fellow Serbian who collapses dead onto the rocky surface.