Was it just us, or was Dick Cheney texting during the big speech? What was so important?
Cheney: U R soooo lucky.
Gonzalez: Tell me about it.
Cheney: I 4got, no red wine. Furniture @ [undisclosed location] isn't scotch-guarded.
Gonzalez: n/p. btw, I tried on your power ties... So where do you keep the launch codes?
Cheney: Check next to the Wii.
Gonzalez: I still haven't spotted Hastert.
Cheney: Denny, where R U?
HouseSpeaker4Eva: I can't see. I'm sitting behind Dikembe Mutombo.
Cheney: Yo, we miss U up here big guy.