Please, block traffic. Tie up intersections. Drive down the wrong side of the street. No, those weren't my prized rose bushes—and they were clearly in your way. I know you were in a hurry. Do whatever you like. Be my guest.

Behold, the presidential SUV:

I don't know what's scarier, the 4,000 rounds-per-minute machine gun, or the Miami Vice background music.

(Hat tip: Gizmodo)